"Do You Think It Will Last?"

It seems that most of the posts I write anymore have to do, in some shape or form, with Starbucks. Maybe someday I'll have something to say that doesn't have to do with it, but that day is not today. Be forewarned: the following post contains information related to Starbucks.

When I had only worked at Starbucks for a couple of weeks, someone asked me if I was married, I said yes. She asked how long, I said 2 years. Then she asked me a question I wasn't expecting: "Do you think it will last?". This stopped me for a moment. I was so surprised, I didn't give a very good answer. It was more of a, "yeah, I think it will" rather than the "We love each other. We are committed to making it work. We knew it wouldn't be perfect when we signed on, but divorce isn't an option for us" response it should have been. But the more I get to know this girl, the more I am understanding where that question came from.

This particular girl is a Middle Eastern native. She came to the United States two years ago, and lived in another large metropolitan area before moving to Chicagoland. She is a 22-year-old flirt, self-described as someone who gets bored easily with relationships. Her work clothes, although they meet dress code, cover only as much skin as needs to be covered. She wears her short shirt unbuttoned as far as she can make it go without exposing herself and doesn't tuck in her shirt, so that it shows just a little bit of skin in the back.

On the other hand, she is very good at being a barista (when she shows up, which is a story told in a previous blog). She knows the customers and their drinks and can make them fastly and efficiently. However, working with her has proven to be somewhat of a challenge. She comes off as helpful and "nice" at first, but becomes demanding and abrasive to the point of rudeness the more she works with people. Oh, its said in a sweet tone of voice: "Janelle, will you........for me?" or "Janelle, don't do......, do it this way.", but the intent is that I am there to answer to her. Other times, she will call drinks when I'm not ready (and I've said I'm not ready) or say them so fast that I can't get them written down. Its almost like she's trying to prove to me that she is better than me. Ok, I give up--she is! I really could do without the point being driven home every time we work together.

I became so frustrated with the situation this week that I asked my managers to put me in a different part of the store than she was because I just needed a break from her. I felt awful that I couldn't get along with someone until I talked with a friend and fellow co-worker who helped me see the situation in a different light. This friend told me that everyone in the store has had to have some sort of confrontation with this girl to get her to back off. She thrives on ordering people around and making them feel incompetant while showing herself to be better than them. My friend reminded me that this girl is lost and she needs Jesus. Really, I should be pitying her because she is trying everything and anything to get attention from co-workers and customers. She has self-image issues just like the rest of us and just wants to be loved. No wonder she asked me if I thought my marriage would last. She doesn't even know what real love is. Once I started seeing the situation in this light, my attitude toward her is changing.

I haven't worked closely with her for a couple of days now, and I'm sure that her micro-managing isn't over. I have decided, however, to not let her decide how my day is going to go. I have also decided to pray for her regularly and for our interactions. I'm sure that one day soon there will be a confrontation of sorts in which I will have to assert myself. I'm not looking forward to that moment, but I'm not afraid of it anymore. If nothing else, Starbucks has certainly been a world of new experiences and growing opportunities. I can't wait to see what is coming down the "Pike". (Ok, only Starbucks customers or partners would get that that's a reference to Starbucks' Pike's Place Roast, which is a coffee brewed daily and that is named after the first Starbucks store in Seattle .)